Wandering around San Francisco this last year, at times overwhelmed with loneliness, I felt drawn to the dedicated benches across our parks.

As I sat beside the name plates, I wondered who I would become. I hoped to be someone so loved that those I leave behind write kind words about me. I hoped those words would be true.

I committed to walking throughout all of Golden Gate Park, collecting benches and their dedications. I wanted to spend time imagining the lives lost, and to figure out what I want to do with the rest of mine.

This is an attempt to face hopelessness, to give it a container. This is data collection as devotion. This is a celebration of the beauty of San Francisco, my new home.

I am responding to life’s uncertainty by building a map. Here’s what I have so far!

How it works: inefficiently, on purpose?

“The enormity of this task sometimes makes me feel a little dizzy, but as a scientist and an explorer I have a duty to bear witness to the Spendours of the World.” – Susanna Clark, Piranesi

• I walk into Golden Gate Park with a journal, notebook and the Gaia GPS app on my phone

• At each bench, I write down latitude and longitude coordinates which I then type into a spreadsheet when I get home

• I take pictures of 1) the bench 2) its dedication 3) its view

• I record my (sometimes aimless) routes through the park as I search for benches

• I build the interactive map in Python using plotly (though I use Tableau to host the draft you see here)

Dispatches from the bench:

• 3/10/25: A sweet man on a bench at the roller rink asks me how many years I’ve been doing this project. I tell him it’s only my first day, the second hour. I ask if he thinks it will take me years. Neither of us know. He said to let him know if I need anything throughout the day, that he has some drinks if I get thirsty.

• 4/13/25: The ducks sprinted (if ducks can do that) toward two women who walked up next to us at Blue Heron Lake. They told us they’ve been coming to feed them every day for 42 years!

• 4/13/25: Later, I met another woman who was watching the herons build nests through binoculars. She asked if I would try to get the map published. I asked if she’d like to be in the picture and she said, “of course!”

• 4/18/25: I sat with a man who understood I was collecting benches, he also reads every single one. He told me about his favorite, a bench for a young girl who died on the other side of Blue Heron Lake who liked bikes. “Nora!” I replied. He told me he sometimes brings her a candle or incense on her birthday to play with from beyond though he never knew her.

• 4/26/25: I was collecting benches in the Rose Garden which was blooming when a saxophonist set up and started playing “Dream A Little Dream Of Me.” Everything was so beautiful it felt ridiculous.

• 5/11/25: I asked a woman if she wouldn’t mind me collecting the dedication of the bench she was sitting on and she called me strange while walking away.